Saturday plans: Invade hungover Belgium.
Brazilian soccer star Neymar has exploded into the global sporting consciousness at the 2018 World Cup. Not for his goals, of which he has two, but for his incredible flops — of which he has several more.
So for Friday’s World Cup quarterfinal between Brazil and Belgium, Belgian fans have found a way to make the most of Neymar’s dives. They’re going to chug their beers each time he falls down.
A Facebook event promising an “Adfundum” each time the Brazilian star hits the turf currently counts 9,700 attendees. Another 26,000 are interested. Ad fundum, which more or less translates from Latin to “to the bottom,” is a rich Belgian tradition of pounding your beer and not finishing until there’s nothing left.
That’s quite a commitment to the game of drink. Neymar has spent an approximate 14 minutes on the turf through four games in the tournament. His tumbling flop was so epic even KFC, typically known for their deep fryers, found a way to roast him. And unlike most drinking games, this isn’t a sip or a shot of beer per infraction — we’re talking a full-on chug, not stopping until the glass can be held upside-down, over your head, while keeping your hair dry.
And it’s happening in the land of Trappist ales, heavy beers whose gravities rival Jupiter’s.
So how drunk will these enterprising Belgians get on Friday night?
Let’s crank out a little math to figure out just how hammered these fans might be before the final whistle blows. For the sake of simplicity, let’s assume a healthy, 25-year-old 180-pound Belgian man and a similarly chipper 25-year-old 120-pound Belgian woman. And let’s assume a 12-ounce pour of the country’s top-selling domestic beer, Jupiler (5.2% ABV).
Neymar, by Swiss TV station RTS’s count, has spent 14 minutes of World Cup time on the ground. He’s officially been fouled 23 times, but that number doesn’t count all the times he’s gone to the turf and failed to gain any sympathy from the officials. There have been a bunch of those.
So, conservatively, let’s say 32 fouls or flops over four games. That works out to eight dives per game. That’s eight ad fundums over the course of two hours, assuming:
a) they don’t drink any other beers before or during the game, and
b) the game doesn’t go into extra time or a shootout (athletes rarely flop during shootouts, but if any man can pioneer the technique, it’s the diminutive Brazilian).
A tie at the end of regulation would mean approximately 2.67 more flops and, thus, 2.67 more chugs.
So! That’s eight beers per person over two hours, or 10 and 2⁄3rds over two and a half. Let’s bust out the handy BAC calculator and check…
Yep. Pretty drunk. Our starting point here is nearly twice the legal limit to drive in America. And remember, that’s just if they drink every time Neymar falls down. Friday night’s going to be a great night to be an Uber driver in Belgium. Saturday morning’s going to be an awful time for everyone.